It's Been A Long Time Coming

I've been meaning to start this blog for a long time but every time I would settle down at the computer to create an account, I couldn't seem to find the energy. But I'm here now, which is all that matters! I don't have a real plan as to what I am going to write in this blog, but as Mark says in Rent, "From here on in, I shoot without a script. See if anything comes of it." I may be writing, instead of making a film, but I feel the concept is the same. I have no specific plans for these posts, but ultimately I want to be documenting my life; which for the last 6 years has been controlled by a severe, incurable chronic pain condition I have called Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS) or Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy (RSD).


I'll get into the details of this condition at a later date, but for now I'll say this: CRPS affects my right leg (from my toes to my hip), left arm and more obscurely, my eyes. The condition makes my affected limbs swell, go scaley, sport the shades of purple, yellow & red, and leaves me in agony all day. The best way to describe the pain I feel is to think of your foot having acid poured onto it, while simultaneously someone stabs you repeatedly in the same spot with a white hot dagger. Sorry for the details, I'll stop there!


One of the hardest parts of living with CRPS is that many people, including doctors, don't believe you when you describe the severity of the pain (and sometimes won't believe you're in pain at all!). Being an invisible illness, it's hard to see with the naked eye that there is in fact anything wrong with you at all. True, some of the symptoms are visible, but they don't look like they are the product of some of the worst pain you could ever feel (McGill University actually says that CRPS is the worst type of pain around!).The frustration I feel when a doctor tells me I'm exaggerating how sore I am or making it up just adds to the pain and makes it that much harder to live with.


The road I've travelled to be sitting here writing this blog hasn't been easy, and I have a long way yet to go. It's been 2,106 days already, but every day I grow that little bit stronger. And from now on, I'll be sharing my experiences here, helping to raise CRPS awareness, one blog at a time.